pillory-hymn

 Ma I've seemed to shoot myself in the foot.  Not literally that is, but the mental anguish is there, and it's all my fault. I just want to make you happy, but like most things, I ruin it. I thought that being in a relationship means being true to one another, but all I seem to do is hurt you. I want to always be honest, to always tell you how I'm feeling, no matter how much it hurts to hear, because it's good to learn from, it's how we learn to keep loving each other. I expect you to be the same too, I always want to know what's going on whenever you're in a bad mood, because I want to learn how I can always be there for you, no matter what

I hope you're all doing well. Moved to the states last year, first time being back here in longer than a week or so since 2011, it's crazy how things change quickly, yet I found myself adjusting to whatever was thrown my way. Since my last bitter journal, things have changed drastucally for me, all mostly good stuff actually. I sought a therapist, and that was actually an uplifting experience for me, I managed to get my legitimate diagnosis and learn how to cope with myself and how I've treated others. I went back to work with a purpose and took care of myself, with the help of friends mostly that I made while living in England. I finally c

its been forever. i'm writing this because i've been looking for a way to vent about the past year and a half that i've been gone for from this site. i think it's safe to say that the reasons for staying active on here are no more. i'm older, busier, and things have not been well in life, and ironically i have no way to translate that artistically. in the next year i am going through a very frightening shift, if i don't decide to kill myself first, that is. i'm retiring from my job that i've had for almost 6 years as of right now, and other than the savings in my bank account, i have seldom of an idea of what i want to do for the rest of my